Good point. We hear Luna pushes them out Canterlot’s windows. That must be at least a fifty meter fall.

Why does everypony think We have a crush on somepony?

It was good to really cut loose and let our anger take over.

Though maybe We overdid it a little…

((ooc: Warning: Graphic, beyond cupcakes imagery follows. Not for the squeamish.))

Let us see how well you make fun of Our friends without any skin!

*Nightmare Moon’s horn glows with a black-and-gold light. From all sides around the anon, small tears begin to form in the world. Screams of hellish agony and blasphemous ecstasy emerge from the tears, alongside hundreds of chains covered in tiny, razor sharp barbed hooks. The chains envelop the anon, pulling tighter and tighter, the hooks catching at him, the barbs setting. Soon nothing can be seen of the anon but a single, terrified eye, then even that is covered, leaving muffled whimpering the only evidence that anything alive is contained within the writhing mass of tearing metal.

Nightmare Moon flicks her horn, and the chains rapidly unwind, pulled by unseen forces back into the hell that forged them. The hooks, firmly embedded in the anon’s flesh, tug and tug, the anon’s skin stretches, and with a scream from the anon’s now-distended mouth, the skin snaps. The skin is taken by the chains, in pieces, into the tears.

Once all the chains have vanished, the tears close, leaving Nightmare Moon standing above a vaguely anon-shaped mass of unprotected muscle and organ.*

Well, still feeling like taunting Our friends?

*A wet gurgle escapes the still-living anon.*

We thought not…

((ooc: I Pinkie Pie swear this is a one-time thing. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Please don’t unfollow me…))

((With apologies to Clive Barker.))

Yes, Our final famous pony rating, before We do Our friends.

Soarin will soon know the sting and praise of Our cutting criticism!

((ooc: Do you want the cutie mark in white, or should I colour it in?))

lunaanswers:

askspikethedemonburner:

lunaanswers:

ask-nightmaremoon:

Handsome and suave, Prince Blueblood is the heartthrob of hundreds of young fillies all throughout Equestria.

He is also a total and complete lie!

Though he claims himself a Prince, there is not a single drop of divine blood in his body. We have done some research, and apparently his…

 And, where did you get your research?

Well she was a part of you so I guess your memories?

 Well, a ‘Lauren Faust’ described him as Sis’ and I’s nephew, on our mother’s side, Fifty-two times removed. And, I’m seriously wondering whether NMM’s info is accurate, or she was inspired from a TV show/comic book…

We mostly got Our information by connecting the dots using the books in Twilight Sparkle’s library, and through rummaging through the royal residence’s trash every night. (Being incoporeal was boring and we needed a hobby. Don’t judge us.)

We suppose he might consider himself to be Celestia’s nephew 52 times removed. However, the same could be said for every other mortal pony created by Corona and Galaxiour.

We imprisoned her on the sun. We thought it would be ironic, and serve to hold her until We had the time to vivisect her properly.

((ooc: Watch the end of ‘The Elements of Harmony’. At around the 19 minute mark, Celestia comes back down from the sun.))

For those mares seeking a more mature stallion, Hoity Toity would be an ideal catch. As the well-established ‘king’ of Canterlot fashion, Toity could deliver economic security unparalleled by any other stallion in Equestria.

By far the oldest stallion to grace this list (unless the rumours We have heard about the Doctor are true), Hoity Toity’s good looks remain well preserved (thanks, do doubt, to his veritable army of personal trainers and dieticians). Even a much younger mare would no doubt be able to see a certain charm in him.

The only real flaw We can see in him is his somewhat abrasive personality. He tends to immediately and vocally comment on anything that does not meet his standards, both in fashion and in fillyfriends.

Rating: Not really our thing, but a solid B overall.

The puns… they burn!!!! And ponies call Us evil!